Guilt of a stay at home mum: .
So, what did you do all day? This is the question all stay at home mum have been asked at least once a week. And this is the very same question that can hurt them the most. This phrase can make them feel like all their hard work has gone to vain.
I am a stay at home mum by choice. I always wanted to spend the first 3 years of my kid’s life with me. I didn’t want to miss a moment. I quit my job because of it. And I gave a chicken heart to invest in child care. But despite being it my choice to be a SAHM I don’t deserve to be felt so little about it.
I feel like I am drowned In guilt all the time. I am glued with my kid 24/7 and by 24/7 I mean it. We co sleep. And of 18 months of her being born I haven’t even been away for her more than one hour. Which also happened twice or thrice. Because I feel guilty of not doing enough. I feel guilty when I long for having a cuppa quietly while I put Teletubbies on Telly so that I can enjoy 7 minutes of quietness. I feel guilty when I fail to clean the house regularly. I feel guilty of the days when I can’t cook and order takeaway. Because what DID I actually do all day?
Everyone forgets or doesn’t wanna remember how emotionally draining it can be with a kid. You have to be on your best behavior ALL THE TIME. They are screaming, calm them down quietly. They are throwing a tantrum, try to figure out what they actually want and have to calmly explain to them why they can’t have it. It’s so hard to bring up a small human who is just learning new emotion. Amidst all of this, you forget to take care of your own emotion and how are you feeling.
So, what did I do all day? I played with my kid, I calmed 6362891 tantrums that my daughter threw, I taught my kid a new word, I managed to cook something, I barely managed to clean, I washed the laundry but didn’t have a chance to dry and most importantly main aur meri tanhayi had that coffee despite feeling guilty. .
Forgive me please...😬 We have had a lovely day today, first time going to Cheltenham, lovely walk around and great place to visit, but still tired after busy day yesterday, so... No home made cooking tonight, it was a Marks and Spencer curry take away, and do you know what? It was rather tasty. BUT, why do I feel guilty not cooking something myself? Yes I know, I am stupid...🙄 #cheltenham#marksandspencer#yummycurry#nothomemade#feelingguilty .
Poor Samudra, I haven't been able to give him my undivided attention... he asks me to go swimming, build sandcastles, draw, do fun activities and I'm always telling him "WAIT! I need to.....".. (reply this email, answer this WhatsApp, chase up so and so, make a quick call, we need to go to a meeting first, etc)... so today he told me big people are boring because they have no time to have fun.... So I packed up my laptop and we ran down to the beach to watch the sunset which was so beautiful. How to enjoy this precious time with him while he's young and be fully present and still be able to work? I feel like my head is constantly spinning and I need time to slow down so I can catch my breath and be present. #schoolholidays#bali#sunset#pantai#beach#travelwithkids#pusing#feelingguilty#rockpool#canggu#endlesssummer
Mengkonsumsi Glamlene di malam hari dapat melancarkan pencernaan,membuang toksin dan sisa makanan serta lemak dalam tubuh,serta mencegah obesitas
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Glamlene juga sudah terdaftar di BPOM dan Halal
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It’s never easy to end a relationship with someone you have cared deeply about. I have been asked “how to get rid of a partner who refuses to let go of you”. Sounds harsh I know 😱 But it’s not about being brutal .. in fact it’s about being the opposite .. kindness and respect are vital.. 💕but also for yourself too. Watch to find out my top tips ✅👌 #breakup#letgo#feelingguilty #surviveandthrive#thedivorcecoach
I’m definitely not one for having kids sleep with me before 6am because my bed is mine only but the #workingmummy guilt got me good yesterday and those 5.30am footprints sucked me in 🥰 Not seeing the kids until 6.45 last night then them in bed by 7.10 I was feeling so bad but know it’s worth it here and there to help provide for my family. Another day today of only seeing them for about an hour meant I was so up for sleepy snuggles this morning! And a fricken massive shout out to the hoods for saving me pretty much the whole last 3 days....you guys are angels!! #morninganuggles#mylittlethumbsucker#workingmum#feelingguilty#soworthitthough
2 1114 October, 2019
Mummy had first day in new job today after weeks of spending time with me. I missed her very much. She bought me new bed and pig toy to make up for it.
Bener gak si detox selain bisa untuk kesehatan tapi bisa untuk kesehatan kulit dan mengatasi jerawat?
Jerawat bisa muncul bukan hanya karena kotoran & debu dari luar yang kena ke kulit, tapi juga bisa timbul dari makanan/minuman yang masuk ke dalam tubuh kamu
Kebayang kan kalau setiap hari kamu makan makanan berminyak + minum yang manis-manis??
Toksin + lemak menumpuk di Usus & bikin hormon gak seimbang, oleh karena itu produksi Sebum jadi meningkat & menyumbat pori-pori kulit sehingga muncul jerawat
Makanya penting banget buat rutin bersihin tubuh dari toksin & lemak .
(Glamlene Mengandung L'Glutathione, Marine Collagen dan Vitamin E yg baik untuk kulitmu juga loh)
Love Your Body. Love Your Skin. GET GLAM
1 814 October, 2019
La CULPA es una de las emociones más destructivas en la que podemos quedar atrapados. Si le hemos fallado a alguien o no fuimos genuinos con nosotros mismos nos sentimos mal, con una carga pesada en el corazón y pensamientos negativos.
Cuando dejamos que la culpa nos agobie y nos castigamos por nuestras faltas, entramos en un círculo de desesperación y desesperanza que nos quita claridad acerca de nosotros mismos y de las situaciones que enfrentamos.
La Culpa es sólo una carga pesada que no construye y que nos impide movernos.
Cambiemos "culpa" por CONCIENCIA Y RESPONSABILIDAD SOBRE NUESTROS ACTOS, sólo así somos dueños de nuestras decisiones.
Tal como eres, eres ABSOLUTAMENTE PERFECTO y es natural, necesario y funcional para tu vida, equivocarse. Es nuestro Ego el que juzga y etiqueta las situaciones que atravesamos como negativas o erróneas, pero en realidad no es así, nada está equivocado en el plan perfecto que trazó tu Alma para aprender. 👉Todo lo que vives lo elegiste tú, tu Yo Superior, para crecer y evolucionar.
Entonces... Aprende de esto que te sucede, muévete, continúa, acéptalo como parte de tu experiencia y aprende la lección.
La culpa te quita la alegría, y si no sientes alegría no puedes disfrutar la vida.
Te vuelves pesado, agobiado... La culpa es se mete en tu cabeza y en tu pecho y te oprime, te aplasta. Cómo podrías entonces bailar? Cómo puede bailar la culpa...? Cómo puede amar? Cómo puede disfrutar? No puede, porque es algo muerto, pesado, vacío...
Y TÚ ESTÁS VIVO!
💠CAROLINA SILVA Psico Tarot
📲11 5793 2602 #tarot#tarotista#tarotistas#tarotreaders#tarotcards#osho#oshozentarot#oraclereading#oraclecards#oraclereaders#culpa#guilt
La Boqueria market, full of fresh seafood and produce by day and bars at night (BTW that fish looks pretty angry).
I bought churros with chocolate then gave them to a homeless man with some money, saying “el chocolate esta mucho calor” (very hot). I could have done so much more.
0 1112 October, 2019
Working 6 out of 7 get's her a little grumpy. I promise i will make it up to you doll ❤
We came. We saw. We conquered...all of the food. First time at Carmine’s. And if I ever go back, I am wearing elastic pants... Also I feel like I cheated on the Olive Garden. #feelingguilty#unlimitedbreadsticks#forlife
This is in my stories today but thought I would go ahead and make it a post also.
Whether you suffer from Migraines or some other thing that causes you to unexpectedly miss work it's such a stressful situation to let your boss or supervisor know. I've dealt with this for over 20 years now and am well aware of the added stress it also puts on my employer. I spent years on the Management side taking callouts and I never made it a point to make an employee feel bad about it.
Of course I don't want to miss work and getting paid. This is especially hard when on a debt free journey. Thankfully I have sick pay hours but what if I didn't? My employer seems to also like to threaten with firing those who miss days no matter the reason so it's a constant worry if I have to miss a day.
This post could go on and on but it's something that needs to be discussed and given awareness.
Apa itu Glamene?
Glamlene adalah Minuman detox yg punya
manfaat untuk membuang lemak, melancarkan BAB, serta membuang toksin yang menumpuk dalam usus .
Selain itu Glamlene dilengkapi dengan kandungan ( L-glutathione, Collagen dan Vitamin e ) yang terbukti berfungsi untuk menjaga,merawat dan mencerahkan kulit loh. Produk ini Halal dan jg aman. karena sudah teruji dan terdaftar di BPOM
Ayo konsumsi glamlene satu kali sebelum tidur untuk tetap cantik dan langsing setiap hari
Love Your Body. Love Your Skin. GET GLAM
I am a natural giver. And probably a bit of a people pleaser as well. I value generosity and care for others. So standing up for my own needs doesn’t come easily to me.
Over the last years, I have learned to set healthier boundaries and say no, deciding how I want to be in contact with others. I have learned that it's ok to put my own needs first.
The thing is, the world doesn't always respond kindly to that. It's easy and comfortable when you're always the one who gives, who drives, who runs - putting their needs over your own. So we all also need to learn how to deal with the feelings of guilt.
Intellectually, I know that guilt is an entirely useless emotion in this context. But it's easy to fall into that trap. We need to remind ourselves that it's not selfish to look after our own needs. It is healthy and normal. We are allowed to say no. We are allowed to take the time and space to feel into a situation.
We are also allowed to change our minds. My first instinct is always to say yes. It's only after I had some time to think and feel that I realize that I actually want to say no.. Ive learned to say: I will let you know. It's choosing a moment of discomfort over resentment.
So this is my mantra for today. It feels good looking after and caring for myself first. Guiltfree. Because if I don’t look after myself and put myself first, who will?
A friend invited me to a celebratory event next week that I'm unable to attend.
Gosh, if that was me, I'd want everyone I care about to be there. Anytime I get a "sorry can't make it" on a special day, it crushes me.
I was considering whether I could rearrange my schedule when I stopped myself.
I'm trying to protect my friend from disappointment! I'm being a total people pleaser right now!
I smiled and the guilt vanished.
People pleasing actually pleases no one, because attending an event out of guilt is not the best intention, and it's not the way I'd want to receive people on my special day either. It's bad energy.
I'd want people to be there because they whole-heartedly WANTED to be there.
The crazy thing too is I have NO IDEA if my friend would even feel disappointed.
It might not phase them at all.
But if they were, isn't it actually a gift to learn how to feel and accept disappointment with grace?
Not that my friend would have THAT experience either,
Anything is possible, and I may never know the actual outcome, because it's NOT ME.
It's not my job to protect someone else from their experience.
Their experience, whatever it may be, is necessary for them to achieve their next level of growth in this life.
They deserve that.
And you deserve to act with the best intentions and live out YOUR experience with trust, confidence, and ease.
Let yourself off the hook, my love.
4 329 October, 2019
Yuk mulai pilih Good Meals untuk menu harian kamu. Kamu juga bisa rutin detox untuk memenuhi serat dan nutrisi tubuh kamu untuk menjaga kesehatan kamu,mengontrol nafsu makan jadi gak gampang lapar, ngemil sembarangan dan Baik untuk merawat kulitmu
Kamu team yang mana?
Good Meals atau Bad Meals?
Love Your Body.Love Your Skin. GET GLAM
Het is al een paar maanden geleden, maar nu pas durf ik mijn verhaal op te biechten 🤦🏼♀️.
En jullie? Hebben jullie ook nog iets te delen? 😉 Tell me!
Bij deze.. 'De biecht' is geopend! 👩⚖️
Blog >> Ongelukjes zitten in een klein hoekje, link in bio. #peuters#loedermoeder#feelingguilty#ikzeitoch
My job is to know how to diet perfectly, not to do it in a perfect way. 👩⚕️ This delicious lunch contains more carbohydrates than needed, so I left some of the meal on the plate, but I think I ate too much of it either. 🙆
It doesn't matter, that it is whole grain pasta with lots of celery, lean meat and the meal is spiced with fresh oregano, basil, thyme and garlic, I even feel guilty about it. 😅
But be positive! 🙂 There is always a next meal to do it in a better way. 😉
Already missing my Indy girl and she’s right here with us. We have been dealing with sick kids the last few weeks and has not made us the most patient of parents. Plus, the load of working, being parents, prepping for a baby, and the normal juggles of life have been trying on all. Lucki reminded me tonight to remember to give each kid some extra loving, because changes are coming. It was a good reminder, because often Indy gets a little more attention due to her age. Tayis will also have yet another big change to adjust to when the newest baby comes, but for right now my worry is Indy and I cannot help it! #mamaworries#mylittlegirl#IndyNora#soontobebigsister#feelingguilty
This is the busiest time of year for me and my job as a photographer. I work anywhere between 90- 110 sometimes + hours every two weeks. And I do it without even blinking an eye because that’s just how it is. .
It is also around this time of the year, every year, where I also get this really guilty feeling every time I walk in the door of my house. I feel guilty that the house isn’t as clean and tidy as I would like it to be. I feel guilty when the dishes sit in the sink longer than they should. I even feel guilty when all I want to do when I come home is get in a 30 minute workout to relieve some stress because it means I’m not using that 30 minutes to get some cleaning done. .
I hate this feeling because it makes me feel like a failure. When I do have a day off I do my best to get as much done as I can but there is so much to do (not just cleaning) and only so much time in a day that I never complete everything. The really sad part is when I come home to my fiancé cleaning the house and I feel extra guilty because he works crazy hours too, usually longer hours than me. I know he is just trying to help and I am very grateful but I always feel like I failed at my job. .
Anyone else struggle with this too? Anyone else struggle to ask for help? Anyone else try to do it all and feel like a failure when they can’t?
Drop a 🧹 emoji if you can relate. .
I am listening all the time “Parents are the role model for their children”. I truly believe in this, but I still get amazed when I see my baby girl trying to do what I do, and it doesn’t matter really what it is!
I love reading, she loves books.
I hang my purse in my arm leaving home, she hangs her little frozen tin in her arm when is leaving home.
I was doing poses for a picture in the pumpkin patch day and... surprise surprise!!... she was doing the same pose as me just beside me!!!
This makes me think really hard, the best way to raise our children is doing it right ourselves, when they are around and when they aren’t around! As the minimal thing they see from us, they get it for them.
It is a bit scary... but it is so sweet at the same time!
Oh boy yesterday was a binge and a half. It started good with a clean breakfast and it went sideways when a client brought in a gourmet almond butter and jam on a huge piece of fresh sour dough bread! It was amazing I have to say. That was then followed by ribs, wings and fries for lunch with wine and #guinness (pic included). From there I ended up watching the UFC and ordered a bunch of stuff from @fiveguys I ate a double cheese burger with all the toppings, a bacon cheese hot dog and half of my wife’s bacon cheese burger!! THEN I ate a package of m&ms! What the hell! I haven’t looked at myself shirtless yet and probably won’t until after my fast;). Luckily I only have to go to my moms house now to eat yet another dirty meal. Ugh, the struggle is real... real yummy! #bingeeating#imstillfull#ribs#wings#feelingguilty#getbackontrack#fitover50#fitnessfoodie
🍦🍰HOW TO GET OVER FOOD GUILT🍕🍔
I just got back from a 4 day trip, and let’s just say my tastebuds were very very happy 😊 Between the healthy salads…I TOTALLY indulged on churro donut holes, ice cream sundaes, pizzas, milk shakes, burgers, animal-style fries – I mean I WENT HARD.
Rewind back just a few years and you’d have a pitiful Cassey feeling bad about her choices and logging extra dreaded hours at the gym to “punish” herself. Cassey today – she just lives her life and owns it!
1️⃣ So how do you get to food freedom?
Think about this: Does feeling guilty reverse the fact that you ate the food? Does it somehow make you feel better? Does it teach you anything? Nope. It just steals your time, makes you feel miserable and gives food way too much power over your thoughts.
2️⃣ Why do you feel guilty?
When you feel guilty about eating ”bad” food, it’s because you think you’ve actually done something wrong. You’re upset. You’re disgusted. You hate yourself for having no control.
But the reality is, food is fuel – not a moral issue! What we need to do is REDEFINE what it means to eat healthy. Feeling guilty for eating “bad” food is just as unhealthy for your mind as feeling superior for eating “good” food.
3️⃣ You gotta stand strong behind your own decisions.
If you’re going to eat a “YOLO meal”, then do it wholeheartedly. Make the decision, then commit to it 100%. Eat it, enjoy it, forget about it, move on. Remember, 1 YOLO meal…or one indulgent weekend won’t ruin everything!
Full blog post at Blogilates.com (bio link) #blogilates
I pray you will join my journey of teaching God’s Word on my YouTube channel “Uplift Past Crossroads.” (Link in bio.) This song was retrieved from https://freebeats.io titled, “Warning Shot”. #conviction You need to know God's love so it can overflow out of your life into others. #feelingguilty On Friday, March 31, 2019, I did a lesson for my life group on Matthew 5:13-16, when Jesus said that we were the "salt and light of the world. I did this at Scott's Chapel A.M.E Church. This lesson is just a snippet called, "Influence | Salt Stings, Christians Should Too." The complete lesson is called, “Influence | Are You Being Who You Were Created To Be?". #upliftpastcrossroads#upliftwithseanchristopherjenkins#uplift#drj#seanchristopherjenkins#troubledontlast#drjsermons Conviction is not a result of God's disappointment in you. Conviction is a result of God's indescribable love for you. #swimminginsaltwater For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of the soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.- Heb4:12 #openwounds No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish.- Luke13:5 #godheals Conviction of sin is God's way of inviting you to restore fellowship with Him. #healing Until you heal the wounds of your past, you are going to bleed. You can bandage the bleeding with food, with alcohol, with drugs, with work, with cigarettes, with sex; but eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life. You must find the strength to open the wounds, stick your hands inside, pull out the core of the pain that is holding you in your past, the memories and make peace with them. #onlygodheals Jesus said, "You are now well because of your faith. May God give you peace! You are healed, and you will no longer be in pain."- Mark5:34 #saltandlightoftheworld "But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed."- Isaiah 53:5 #jesuscanheal
1 86422 August, 2019
Eating that whipped hummus from earlier this week with everything - roasted veg, on toast, by the spoonful (it’s what I imagine a really tasty cloud puff would taste like ;) This is my current lunch special, @nyshuk’s very addictive crackers (a collab with @haydenflourmills), dipped in whipped hummus, drizzled with za’atar oil, and you’re all set!
HOW TO DEAL WITH A FOOD HANGOVER
Twas the day after Thanksgiving and there were a few food (and maybe drink) hangovers being felt across the land!
Food “hangovers “have you heard of the term before?
If you haven’t let me enlighten you, it’s that feeling the day after a you’ve had a super indulgent feast.
You feel sluggish, dehydrated, perhaps bloated, have a headache & you might have brain 🧠 fog.
It’s basically your gut saying well that was a lot of indulgent food which is fine every now and again but I don’t want it all the time!
(Wouldn’t it be totally weird if your gut could talk)
The level of symptoms will vary person to person and also with the amount and type of food eaten and you may be one the lucky ones who doesn't experience any of them!
So let's look at what you can do both physically and mentally, I'm very aware of the thoughts that can go alongside these.
One day of “party” eating isn’t going to have trashed or impacted progress so as long as it is retained to the one day so you decide what happens now.
REMEMBER it's the act of consistently chronically overeating that causes problems so don’t spend the day after feeling guilty, because put simply you have nothing to feel guilty about.
You don’t need to implement any drastic compensation tactics.
👍🏻Being active is a good idea to help clear your mind and make you feel less sluggish and personally I feel better after a weights session.
But if you were planning 3 hours on the treadmill today to try & “burn off” your turkey dinner don’t.
By all means go for a brief run if feel like it but don’t use it as a means of“punishment “or banish feelings of guilt.
Ensure your next meal is lean protein, veg and only eat it when you feel hungry.
Listen to your body.
The take home message enjoy the times that may lead you to a food “hangover “but just make sure it’s business as usual the next day ❤🤗
How was your Thanksgiving?👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻
21 93023 November, 2018
[ Méditation et zéro déchet : de l'art de la déculpabilisation ]
En ce moment, je n'arrive plus à me concentrer. Je n'arrive plus à déconnecter. Mon cerveau est en ébullition jour et nuit, éveillée comme endormie (ceux qui suivent mes stories savent que j'ai, notamment, récemment rêvé en sous-titré... 🤔) autant pour des questions importantes que pour des détails. Impossible de prendre une pause de mes propres pensées. Bref, j'ai besoin de souffler un peu, donc je me suis remise à la méditation que j'avais légèrement abandonnée.
Et j'ai pu vérifier, une nouvelle fois, que, VRAIMENT, je suis incapable de méditer autrement qu'allongée. La position la plus recommandée, assise, le dos droit mais détendue, ce n'est pas pour moi : je ne ressens pas ma respiration et je me crispe. J'ai testé plusieurs variantes sans être convaincue. Donc j'adapte ma pratique à mes possibilités et à mes besoins. Sans culpabiliser. Parce que le but de la méditation n'est pas d'avoir une pratique parfaite, mais de se faire du bien, avec bienveillance et sans jugement. 🙏
Et vous savez quoi ? C'est exactement pareil pour le zéro déchet. Oui, dans l'idéal il faudrait tout acheter bio/en vrac/local/de saison/vegan/non transformé/à un petit producteur/d'occasion/sans produits toxiques... Mais en pratique, qui arrive à faire tout ça en même temps, 100% du temps, du jour au lendemain ? Personne. Alors on souffle un coup, on déculpabilise et on adapte sa pratique pour faire autant de bien que possible à la planète sans nous faire du mal à nous-mêmes. Tranquillement, à un rythme qui nous est bien personnel, selon nos possibilités, sans nous forcer. Mais ça ne veut pas dire sans progrès ni volonté de faire mieux ! 💪🏻
Notez en commentaire ce sur quoi vous voulez déculpabiliser pour vous permettre de progresser à votre rythme sans prise de tête. En espérant que ça vous soulagera d'un poids ! 😊