So, as I see in my selfies of the last week: I’ve not been in the best place. I’ve been tired, moody, quick to pick a fight, tired, emotional, tired..you get the picture (padumtss). I realized that with Ace’s birthday coming up, I’m struggling. I want to feel happy and excited to celebrate it, which on the one side I am. But I’m also going thru major flashbacks of his birth, of the horrifying feelings we went thru after his birth and the sadness that we had to go through it all, and are still recovering from. And then I get angry with myself that I can’t just be happy for the healthy, funny, smart and generally amazing little boy we created. I also realized this time last year is when I finally broke down and had to get the help I needed to recover and I’m still in recovery.
So this week might turn out be emotionally all over the place, but I’m aiming to get through it with a semblance of grace and try to focus on the good while experiencing the sad. #gotthis#ithink#ptsdmom#mentalhealth#itsthejourneynotthedestination
5 51 hour ago
The weekend is only a hop and skip away... Friday is a good day to take a few minutes and look back at the week to reflect on the good, the bad and the “eh” moments.
Don’t beat yourself up for not accomplishing 100% of your list, relish in what you have completed.
Look at what you have left on your plate and don’t dump the scraps but chew on them for a moment and figure out why they’re leftover.
Use today to complete what you can cross the finish line with and you will have a fulfilling end of the week.
At age 23, Oprah was fired from her first reporting job.
At age 24, Stephen King was working as a janitor and living in a trailer.
At age 27, Vincent Van Gogh failed as a missionary and decided to go to art school.
At age 28, J.K. Rowling was a suicidal single parent living on welfare.
At age 28, Wayne Coyne (from The Flaming Lips) was a fry cook.
At age 30, Harrison Ford was a carpenter.
At age 30, Martha Stewart was a stockbroker.
At age 37, Ang Lee was a stay-at-home-dad working odd jobs.
Julia Child released her first cookbook at age 39, and got her own cooking show at age 51.
Vera Wang failed to make the Olympic figure skating team, didn’t get the Editor-in-Chief position at Vogue, and designed her first dress at age 40.
Stan Lee didn’t release his first big comic book until he was 40.
Alan Rickman gave up his graphic design career to pursue acting at age 42.
Samuel L. Jackson didn’t get his first movie role until he was 46.
Morgan Freeman landed his first MAJOR movie role at age 52.
Kathryn Bigelow only reached international success when she made The Hurt Locker at age 57.
Grandma Moses didn’t begin her painting career until age 76.
Louise Bourgeois didn’t become a famous artist until she was 78.
Whatever your dream is, it is not too late to achieve it. You aren’t a failure because you haven’t found fame and fortune by the age of 21.
Hell, it’s okay if you don’t even know what your dream is yet. Even if you’re flipping burgers, waiting tables or answering phones today, you never know where you’ll end up tomorrow.
Never tell yourself you’re too old to make it.
Never tell yourself you missed your chance.
Never tell yourself that you aren’t good enough.
You can do it. Whatever it is that sets your soul on fire. #goals#gotthis#dreams#goforit#livethedream
#fitpregnancy Journal Day 9 -
Doing pretty good
Food Log -
Breakfast - 2 eggs, 1 flour tortilla
Lunch - leftover spaghetti, toasted whole wheat English muffin, raspberry jam, almond butter
Snacks- 2 string cheese, apple, handful Cheerios, honey mamas chocolate, green smoothie w/ protein powder
Water - 72 oz
Steps - 9,716
Got my yoga in this morning. Day was good, took about a 30 min nap. I feel better about eating choices, it’s something I always feel I can do better with though. Logged my rating in Myfitness pal, I was under calories by about 250, according to what I’ve read I should be at. I do feel like I could eat more, so I’ll keep logging to see if I can get closer. Grateful for my water intake. The majority of my steps came from working with horses, which was great. I’m feeling pretty good with where things are right now. How I am doing compared to where I want to be is good. I am making good progress and that is what matters most. Tomorrow is market day so steps might be challenging to get in. My key to my treadmill is lost :/ so I can’t hop on that in the evening. I’ll see what I can do. Might do some strength training in the evening. 🏋️♀️ No matter where you are and where you want to be, just start. It won’t look perfect but you can correct course and tweak along the way and then you are most likely to stick to what you are reaching for.
𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘵𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺...
But not much comes without a fight.
I had this thought the other day and I truly believe it because I’ve seen in time and time again in my life and in other’s around me!
When you feel that itch of uncomfortable, need to change, the fire building inside to do something. 𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍. The longer you wait, the more you slip back into the “usual”, the routine, the comfortable. The less likely you are to take that next step toward what you want. The hobby, the job, the dream, the change, the move, the support, the accountability. Take the next logical, achievable step and figure out the big picture along the way.
You may get tired, feel doubtful or even think of giving up bummer right?! Just keep in mind you were created for greatness, you can develop the skills you need to do this and you have the support of family, friends, followers and colleagues to get it done! You Will Make It!
Key to life.....You have to stop being afraid of what could go wrong, and start being excited of what could go right! Live your life unattached from the approval of others! Just be yourself. Let people see the real, imperfect, flawed, quirky, beautiful, magical person you are! #gotthis#newadventures#lovinglife#single
All glammed up in this one...lol. If you look in my eyes you’ll see joy. That’s because I took this one at an event and I was having fun being on stage. It took me years to get over the fear of stages and fall in love with them. But it’s possible to master anything. That I know for sure. What fear are you getting over today?
If you get tired learn to rest, not to quit.
Na een race dag van gisteren moest ik vandaag de rem letterlijk intrappen. Ik vind dat denk ik wel het moeilijkste wat er is, remmen. Tijdens het autorijden zie ik remmen als een zwakte.
Alleen in dit geval was vandaag remmen het verstandigste. Zwak zou zijn als ik had doorgegaan. Ik had dan roofbouw gepleegd op mijzelf.
Ik vind de dingen die ik doe zo geweldig en krijg er zoveel energie van dat ik geen dag wil missen.
En de afspraken die ik vandaag had, had ik zo naar uitgekeken.
Ik kan goed mijn grenzen verleggen en ik kan er goed overheen walsen. Anderzijds kan ik ook heel goed mijn grenzen bewaken. En vandaag heb ik dat gedaan.
Romy is ziek, Dani is ziek en ik voel me ook niet top.
De ziekte Sarcoidose zit o.a. in mijn longen en speelt enorm op sinds gisteren. Ik heb wat slechte dagen zeg maar, erg benauwd en mijn longen zitten vol ontstekingen.
Ik ben mijn ziekte nog aan het leren kennen en mijn lijf aan het herontdekken, ermee samenwerken en niet mijzelf tegenwerken. Ownen!
En voordat ik mij slechter ga voelen heb ik vandaag op de rem getrapt. En ik ben fucking trots op mijzelf dat ik dit heb gedaan. Ik vond het moeilijk, maar I did it.
En achteraf, met een laptop op schoot, facetimen en telefoon heb ik uiteindelijk echt niet stil hoeven zitten en heb ik ook vandaag, op een afgeremd moment, heerlijk mijn ding kunnen doen.